Thursday Thoughts

*Grey's Anatomy always makes me cry. ALWAYS.

*I love watching my dog's pure enjoyment when we go on our daily walks.

*Sometimes even when you aren't alone you can still be lonely.

*I want to snuggle/cuddle right now and Jackie is snuggled up to my side :)

*Rejection hurts

*I love that when I make spaghetti it lasts me a few days. I really like spaghetti

*It makes my eye twitch when people spell ridiculous as rEdiculous.

*I am super excited about going to New York for a week in November. I am going to try and go see Wicked and that has me WICKED excited!!!

Wednesday What-nots with Jen

*Last night while watching the Biggest Loser (side note: cannot STAND Tracy) Jen decided to see how hard jumping up onto the step would really be. Only she didn’t have step, so she chose the ottoman. It’s a squishy ottoman. I reminded her that the key is to make sure she bends her legs to get the clearance and swing her arms so she has enough momentum…because you know, I am a professional trainer and stuff. Anyway, Jen gets into her crouch position, swings her arms, and leaps. She made it, landed with both feet on the ottoman and promptly fell backwards off the ottoman, still in her crouch position, onto the floor. Because the ottoman was squishy on top it didn’t allow her the chance to catch her balance.

IT. WAS. HILARIOUS.

I almost peed my pants laughing so hard and at one point I stopped breathing and my face turned bright red. I am surprised none of her neighbors came to check on us because as she was falling backwards we both let out loud horrified screams and then burst into cackling laughter once we realized she hadn’t hurt herself. I am sure her husband Brad thought we were insane. And he would be right.

*Earlier in the day when Jen came home for lunch, she couldn’t find her dog (he was our dog when we lived together, but she got him and the Charmed DVD series in the divorce, but I still totally have visitation rights). He was supposed to be out back or in the garage, but was nowhere to be found. She called me and told me the situation and I put on some shoes and a sweatshirt and told her I would be right there. I live down the block from her. I opened the door and turned the corner to head toward her street and there was Jack sniffing around the neighbor’s yard looking like a drowned rat because it had been raining all morning. I returned Jack to a very relieved Jen. Apparently the side gate blew open at some point in the morning and Jack decided to go exploring in the neighborhood and to see if his Momma Erica was home. Thankfully no one stole him. He is a pretty cool dog.

*Jen’s niece T is coming to visit this weekend, well she is flying in today actually. T is 12 and we are going to spoil her rotten! It is going to be awesome.

I say nom nom nom to cheeseburgers

I was guilted into getting a salad a Carl’s Jr. Lame!

Okay, so I have been trying to lose some weight and eat a little healthier.

I went over to Mike’s this evening. We hung out and watched some aka A LOT of college football (I think LSU is waaaaay overrated). Then decided to go to Home Depot and get hardware for my gates…that have yet to be made or installed, 3 weeks later. But I am not bitter, much.

As we were leaving Homies Mike asked me if I had eaten dinner yet and when I said no he suggested going through the drive thru at Carl’s Jr. Sounded good to me and I knew he really didn’t have any food over at his place (well, there was food, but it all had to be made and would take more time than I wanted to spend on making something to eat).

We get to the speaker and I tell Mike I want the #1 aka The Famous Star Burger meal. He looks at me and says, “They have chicken sandwiches, look. Or salad. The charbroiled chicken salad looks good. Do you want to try that?”

I think about the cheeseburger and I know, I KNOW, the salad is the better option. So I agree.

Mike tells the woman that is all and starts to drive toward the window and says…

“I had their Bacon Cheeseburger earlier today.”

Me, while giving a death glare, “asshole!”

The salad was good, but not as yummy as the burger and fries would have been.

Kevin Bacon and his 6 degrees of separation can suck it.

The scary thing about evil is that you never see it coming. Evil people don’t wear signs or have horns. They look just like you and me. They blend and they pass. And we never know they are coming until it is too late. You can’t see true evil and that scares the shit out of me.

I deal with drama and see people who have crazy chaotic lives. I have seen a mother so addicted to meth that she didn’t care about the child growing inside her, she just needed her next fix. I have seen women bruised and beaten and terrified and lost, trying to find the way out. I have seen and known people who were killed by those who claimed to love them. I have heard horrific stories parents tell me about the trauma their children have suffered at the hands of adults. I have seen a woman so scared of her child’s father finding out where they live and killing them she refused to obtain original birth certificates for her and her child so they could qualify for health insurance. I have seen adolescents living on the streets because their parents have kicked them out for being gay. I have seen and heard all kinds of atrocities. But they have all been experienced with some detachment.

They were all experiences I had while I was working. It was my job to help and offer solutions and provide resources. And while these stories were all tragic in their own way, I learned early on to detach. I couldn’t help them if I was a blubbering mess. And I couldn’t afford to lose a piece of my soul to each one of their stories. There would be nothing left of me if I let each one of these stories touch me personally. It may seem harsh, but self preservation is also important. I know there is evil in the world, I am reminded daily of its existence, I still try and keep it at bay.

But when you realize you or someone you love has brushed up alongside evil, it turns your insides cold. Your heart pounds and your breath stops and you are terrified. You are rocked to your very core.

Six degrees of separation is not even remotely far enough.

Darrin Daily is evil.

Wednesday What-nots

• Do you ever forget your phone, but you still feel or hear phantom rings and are convinced someone is calling you? I wonder if that is what if feels like when you lose an arm or a leg and you have a phantom limb…only a phantom phone is not as tragic as a phantom limb. And yes I am most likely going to hell.

• I want a blackberry so bad I can taste it. I also know it is not really practical at this exact moment to get one. But it is painful everyday I am without one :(

•I was called childish by a man who logged into his wife’s facebook page and updated her status to say I was childish. Um, what? Idiot.

• I should be in charge running the world.

• I should also be independently wealthy so I don’t have to work

• Is anyone else obsessed with facebook game applications? I love Mafia Wars.

• Every show created by Joss Whedon, I love. I also completed watching the entire series of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and am now working on Angel.

• I made applesauce from scratch and it was SUPER easy. Who knew?

• I am going to get back into blogging if it kills me