Thursday, May 21, 2009

Flashback Friday - Family Vacation Part II


Scary Mommy does Flashback Friday. So here is part two of the family vacation that occurred in December 2007:

Last night I wrote a great blog about my day yesterday and when I went to post it, Myspace ate it. I was too frustrated and tired to try and rewrite. I will now attempt to match the greatness of the original blog, but I cannot make any promises.

The other night when I was telling everyone about the excitement of getting to Califormia I failed to mention the crazy waitress we had at the hotel restaurant. I was so tired, I blocked it from memory. Sam, Alex, and I all decide to head down to the hotel restaurant for some dinner, our parents were off somewhere shopping. We arrive at the restaurant about 8ish and there is no one there. This makes the 3 of us a little nervous but the server tells us to sit anywhere. We naively pick a table, having no idea what we have just gotten ourselves into.

Our server sounds like she has been smoking for 30 years and Sam likes to describe her as a female version of Joe Pesci...this is pretty accurate. She comes over to our table, hands us menus and takes our drink orders. After bring us our drinks she then takes our dinner orders.

As we are waiting for our dinner a woman comes into the restaurant, obviously a co-worker or manager of our server. This woman proceeds to tell a story about a bad experience she had at Sam's Club. She thought the price of an item was $3.99 but when she got to the checkout the price was actually $19.99. The woman is talking very loudly and my brothers and I have already heard this story 3 times, while we were out in the lobby. The woman has completed the story with our server and heads over to the bar where we hear her begin to tell the story again to the bartender. The three of us all exchange eye rolls. All of a sudden our server is standing at our table, motions to the woman who just left and makes a talking gesture with her hand and says "yak, yak, yak." Um, ok, weird.

The next time we see our server she is bringing out our dinners. It is immediately obvious that one of the three plates is extremely hot and burning her. Does she put down the hottest plate first? No! She sets the scalding hot plate down last. What kind of crazy logic is that. The hot plate is Sam's, he ordered nachos and we assume the whole plate was put in the oven to melt the cheese. As she sets the plate down she turns to Sam and says, "That plate was hot!" We all nod our heads in acknowledgment but apparently that was not good enough. She says, "No, it was really hot! See..." And she presses her hand against Sam's cheek. The horrified look on Sam's face was PRICELESS! Now that she has traumatized Sam she turns her attention to Alex. He has ordered buffalo wings. She says to him, "Sorry, that took so long, we had to go kill the chickens. Just kidding we keep them dead in the back!" WTF!? The woman is crazy.

We manage to complete our meal, somewhat in shock. Then she brings out the check. She reaches in front of me and hands the check to Sam. She says "I don't know why I am handing this to you, but you are the oldest here and are probably paying." OH NO SHE DIDN'T! I am the oldest by 4 years and I was the one PAYING! After all of this we head back to our room where we all crash and try and put the memory of this night behind us.

Yesterday morning we awoke to our mother yelling, "I CAN'T HEAR HIM!" All three children bolt upright from a dead sleep, our hearts are pounding, thinking, uh oh that's mom's angry voice, someone is in trouble. Then our father calmly says, "Sue, you're dreaming." What the hell, she just scared the crap out of all of us! The rest of the morning continues uneventfully. We get dressed and head off to Disneyland.

The beauty of my parents having grown children and modern technology providing all of us with cell phones...we are not required to stick together all day long. Before we split apart we all ride the Indiana Jones ride and attempt to ride the Pirates of the Caribbean. We are almost at the front of the line for this ride when they experience mechanical problems and the ride is closed for several hours. Apparently when children do not get to go on their ride they begin to scream bloody murder in your ear...or maybe that was just the child directly behind me.

After this my brothers and I decide to go our own way and leave the parentals to do whatever it is parentals do at Disneyland. The three of us trek over to Splash Mountain. Keep in mind we have all been to Disneyland before, have been on this ride before, and know that there is a chance of getting somewhat wet. No, we did not get wet, we were drenched! The sign said, 'Caution, you may get a little wet on this ride.' Um, no, the sign should have said, 'Hey stupid, you will get completely soaked, there are no towels available at the end of this ride, and you still have the rest of the day to wander around Disneyland.' I have never gotten that wet on this ride, ever! Mid ride I had to move my phone and camera into my bra just to keep them dry. As I stepped off the ride my shoes were squishing. Alex was able to wring out his sweatshirt. We did however get an awesome photo of the three of us! When we got back to the hotel room at 10pm, Sam's sock was still wet, 10 hours after we went on the freaking ride!

The rest of the day passed without any mishaps. We all left Disneyland still speaking to everyone and we were tired but happy. Over all the day was fun and I have come to realize how much I enjoy both of my brothers. They are hilarious. There was a minor spat between everyone right before bed, but this morning it is all forgotten and we are preparing for the cruise portion of our adventure. I do have sunburn from Disneyland though, so much for fading freckles!

For everyone who has been monitoring the sleeping arrangements, I lucked out and Alex chose to sleep on the floor instead of sharing a bed with me. I am still not sure whether to be relieved or slightly offended! On the cruise, my brothers and I will be sharing a cabin and our parents are in another room, thank god. It will be nice to have a place to retreat when the family vacation stress level has just about made you snap.

I hope everyone is having a good and I will write again...more on the cruise part later.


P.S. I thought California was supposed to warm? I have been chilled and unable to get warm since we arrived. Mexico better be warm or I want a refund!


Miss Rosa said...

Know what would be cooler than a vacation flashback? A vacation! I need one!

E said...

I wish! Although I am going camping this weekend, but I would prefer a vacation in a hotel with a fruity drink complete with an umbrella.

Scary Mommy said...

I think leaving Disney on speaking terms can be considered a successful vacation! :) I've got to get there one of these days.

LiLu said...

Aaaaand now I want nachos. :-)

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